After Covid and Personal Tragedies, Allentown Woman Restores her Mental Health with Help from St. Luke’s Penn Foundation

Paula Davis of Allentown is a wife, a mom and a retired long-term substitute teacher. She raised four children while her husband served in the military. But after a series of traumatic events and a bout with COVID, Paula became a shell of the woman she used to be – without even realizing it.

“My oldest son was killed in a car accident, and my niece died 18 months later,” the 66-year-old said. “Several years later, I lost my brother and my dog right after the pandemic shut the world down. And then I got COVID, which resulted in severe gastrointestinal issues. But I just plowed through because that’s what was expected.”

It was Paula’s son who spoke up and helped her realize that she was not okay. “My son said to me, ‘Mom, you are disappearing.’ And he was right. I thought about what kind of next chapter I wanted to have and knew I needed help.”

Paula was diagnosed with anxiety and depression, and sought counseling through St. Luke’s Penn Foundation, a decision that she says was life changing.

St. Luke’s Penn Foundation, with 35 inpatient and outpatient programs at more than 15 locations, is the largest fully integrated network of mental health and addiction treatment services in eastern Pennsylvania and New Jersey. Using a compassionate, personalized and holistic approach, St. Luke’s Penn Foundation’s model of care offers the opportunity for an empowering and life-changing experience.

Dr. Einat DeLong, a clinical psychologist with St. Luke’s Penn Foundation, worked with Paula and immediately helped her develop tools that she could easily use in stressful situations. Paula also left each session with homework to help her understand her triggers and how to cope with them.

“An important thing for Paula was to give herself permission to prioritize herself,” Dr. DeLong said. “We must remind ourselves by saying we are just as important as the other priorities. For Paula, she was in a pattern of prioritizing everything and everyone but herself. For example, raising her kids while her husband was deployed. It was really important for her to give herself a voice because she was silencing it for so long by prioritizing others.”

Dr. DeLong’s individualized therapy involved a cognitive behavioral approach, making sure Paula was able to identify and edit maladaptive thinking and behavioral patterns while also implementing a self-care plan, setting boundaries, and learning to feel comfortable saying no to things and being intentional with her time.

“I have become so much more aware of the people, places and things that are toxic for me,” Paula said. “I come from a family of high achievers, so I never felt good enough. I’ve learned to celebrate what I do, and that I am good enough. I’ve also learned that I want to be validated as much as I give validation.”

Paula appreciates the true partnership she has with her psychologist, which was especially important for her.

“The beauty and strength of our relationship is that we are a team,” she says. “We have effective communication skills. We can laugh or cry together. She can call me out on things; we can be completely honest with one another.”

Paula wants other people who may be struggling to know that they are not alone. Since her initial work with Dr. DeLong, Paula has seen a variety of adversity, from the death of a brother-in-law, a broken hip and cancer diagnosis for her sister, her young brother’s house was damaged by a tornado, and she was on-scene for an active shooter situation near a local school.

“I have felt settled through all of this because of the many coping skills that Dr. DeLong has taught me, and the work we have done together,” she said. “I want people to understand that life therapy can literally be life changing in that it gives you the tools to help as life rolls into you and over you. And most importantly, all that I have learned has just become a natural part of my DNA, who I am. Therapy truly can be the best gift you give yourself, and one that has lasting impacts.

“Don’t be afraid to reach out for help. Let others help you carry your burdens. If you feel off, find someone who can help you get your rhythm back. And don’t worry about what others think. Focus on what you need. You only have one life, so make sure the next chapter is a better, brighter one.”